I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
