I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
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