i think my tv is drunk
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
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