i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
