She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
