I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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