He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
It's shark week go big or go home
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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