Say something about gay babies.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
