this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
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