me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
