And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
