guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
