It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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