just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Randomize
