If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
