Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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