I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
