how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
