Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
so let's talk penis.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Randomize
