So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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