So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
