just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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