Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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