My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
