I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
