i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
