Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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