My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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