Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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