ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
no, he came in my armpit
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
