We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize