I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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