Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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