you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
