none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Randomize
