This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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