Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
