the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
How external is "for external use only"?
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
