Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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