this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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