I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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