...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Randomize
