Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
