Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
