Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Randomize
