Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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