They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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