ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
