yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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