You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
