OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Randomize
